All those Birthdays!!

I can't keep up with all that partying! A little while ago, well mid March is only a little while ago isn't it... It was my Birthday! The big 3!! That means I can legally vote and drink alcohol... Uh what Mum? What do you mean by "no you can't do either" ?!?! But ... but I'm 3!! Pff the woman doesn't know what she's talking about anyway... So where was I? Ah yes MY birthday... Well I had a fabby time with sun shining and all. A little start with playing with my favourite buddy, mister upside down piggy. Well he is a swedish piggy after all so that makes sense that he is upside down in Aussieland... 

Then the minions got me pressies!! An insane rope ball with plenty of ropes going out in every directions, LOVE it! So I did a few crazy zoomies in the backyard. Mum was only just able to catch me with the camera, but it's all blurry...

Then they also gave me a strange thing... I know I had to do a double take... Turns out it is a raw hide with some tastiness on it. Didn't last long! Nom nom... Pretty cool birthday hey!!

And then recently, Mum and I realise that it was already 2 years that we started this blog! Oh my Dog!! 2 years have gone by so fast. I haven't been able to write as many posts as I want to lately because Mum is always hugging the computer pretending to "work"... But I think that it is amazing that we both pawed 338 posts together so far! We have some more coming up as I haven't told you what those minions were up to earlier in the year... Oh they don't think they will get out of that without me dobbing on them...
Anyways all what is left to say is HAPPY BLOG ANNIVERSARY!!! And may it "live long and prosper"

Uh oh!

Well look at that slack! How long has it been that I haven't been pencilling my extraordinary adventures here!! So much happened that I am not sure where to start...
Well that means I will have to write a lot of new posts doesn't it!

But in summary:
- I am a very wise adult pup cause I am 3 (or Mum thinks so... she likes to dream...)
- the minions went crazy on renovations in the house...
- my grandpawrents from France came here to visit for a few weeks
- I got abandoned while they all went and had fun with wombats!!! (I am still sulking about that by the way)
- Nanna came to visit too :)
- we all nearly drowned and flew away in a crazy cyclony weather
- THE FIRE IS BACK ON IN THE CHIMNEY YAYYYYY

And that's just only a short summary, so you see I got lots to talk about. Now I need to make sure I keep an access to a computer because t'is not easy with those minions...

Just so you can see why I am still sulking about the fact they left me all alone while they went to have fun, look at the pics they took :O

look at all those friends to play with I didn't get to meet!

and look at all that space to run...

Refinement

Mum is starting to doubt that I am an actual real dog... I have been telling them forever that I am not a dog I am a little person but they never listen anyway, so at least it is good that she is starting to doubt.

So what made Mum start to see the light you will ask me?... Well last time we were going for a stroll through the neighbourhood. At the end of our street Mum suddenly went all "ohhh" "poor little thing" blah blah blah. So I looked at what she was looking at. And it appeared that a blue tongue lizard met his maker as they say. The blue tongue was dead as a dodo with no obvious trace of damage. Not sure what happened to him... However, I went to have a little sniff. So do not be alarmed I sometimes go and sniff dead things if they are still in a rather entire state. I DO NOT go close to decomposing things ewwwwww!!!!! I still do not touch the entire dead things, just sniff. Would you put dead things with all the feathers/skin/entrails still on/in in your mouth?? I need things to be alive and running for fun, or a bit of processing and presentation for my food please!...

Anyway, usually I just take a sniff and walk on, I am not sure what it was in this case but gosh just one sniff made me a bit queasy... Yes right Mum stop making faces and dobbing me in... Alright I just got overtaken by nausea and had a right chuck while looking rather pitiful... Happy now Mum? I said it.... It is not my fault if I am a sensitive little thing.
Now Mum is saying that I am poncey and not a tough boy and that maybe we need to go in the countryside for a bit because I am too much of a city-slicker....
Whatever Mum when you are finished with your metaphysical questions, I need my pedicure after my spa so if you are looking for me I will be listening to the radio on my day bed...

A pup has to do what a pup has to do...

Well you see, I got a bit jealous a few days earlier... Hearing from all those pups on twitter who are allowed on the big bed with their minions, I decided to make a break for it. Dad was away up north playing with other dogs (humpfffff!!!) and it was the last night of him being away... So when Mum told me to go on my bed after we were calling it a night, I jumped straight up on the big bed uninvited and dropped down quickly into a tiny curled up ball on Dad's spot... RESULT!!
Unfortunately, Mum didn't see the cuteness and fun side of it and I got unceremoniously thrown out...  Even with my bestest puppy eyes and ears, her cold frozen heart did not melt the tiniest bit... Darn woman!! *sigh* I think I have to try that on Dad when we're alone together, he wouldn't push me off the big bed for sure!

I'm hungry...

The minions are always making food for themselves and never give me anything... ahem... yes it's true, I am a poor starving pup!!! So I have to invent new ways of making them know that I am a tad peckish... I have tried the whine, the gentle nose poke, the open tap drool... It takes a lot of effort!

So lately I have found a variant: the drool bubble!! 

behold the mighty drool bubbler!

This takes a lot of mastery in drooling technique, it is not for the novice pup!! And so far it has been quite efficient... look at what I scored! What uh yes Mum... that is your omelette... for now...

T'is too hot

There has been some really hot weather lately. I know I have short fur, but I still do not like it when it is in the 30s˚C. Nothing you can do except sweat, pant and get sunburnt. I don't want to get my poor nose sunburnt! Ouch! And another issue is that the stones and roads get hot and it roasts my paw pads!! So the only thing to do is to snooze, preferably under the fan. You have to find the right comfortable position though. It can take a bit of effort... 

quite comfy but would be better if I had
the space to stretch my head

The minions laughed at me because I was wriggling so much that I rolled off the sofa... Several times... The first time Dad was underneath me. That cushioned the landing if you see what I mean... The time after that, I heard a bit of a rush of movement of what sounded like my bed before I got rudely awaken while falling... Oh weird my bed was underneath me, thought I left it across the room...

I'm HOT, whine... I want to go in the pool, whine...

Anyway, looks like the hot weather is going to continue for a few more days, it's too much! Can I go in the pool now please?

They've gone back :(

I don't like January... I have loads of fun with the minions during the Christmas/New Year break because they take a few days off work. It's tiring to have them all day here at home, but it is great to be able to beg for treats and cuddles whenever you feel like it throughout the day. Normally, I have to wait until they come back in the evening... However, this year, as you can see from my previous posts, there has been some naughty behaviour from the minions... They went out, did gardening and tried to not pay attention to me, also played with new pets without me... Even worse, I have even heard that they went to the beach without me!!! That is unforgivable!! TUT TUT TUT!!!!

But now they went back to work a couple of weeks ago. At first I was happy to have a bit of peace and quiet for my beauty sleep, but now I'm bored... so I have decided that I am sulking... That will teach them!

They've even found new pets!

See told you I was badly looked after... Not only do they spend all of their time doing some gardening, which between you and me, is just a fake excuse to tease me and have fun doing some digging that they always forbid me to do.... Well now they are even playing with new pets in the house!! 

I thought that the hens were largely annoying enough, at least they are at the front of the house... But no!! The minions are now playing with the spiders in MY backyard and on MY patio. I am not even allowed to play along. Always sent away! Poor me. Mum keeps dancing and using little cans that spray smelly stuff. I am not sure how fun those new guys are because they don't seem to have a lot of stamina. They appear to always take very long naps together after playing with the minions. Think they are very bored easily those weird new pets...

So badly looked after...

Look at what the minions got busy doing instead of playing with me during their time off! This is unacceptable!! Took them ages and apparently that's not even finished. They kept going out and leaving me in the house...
I think I will have to report them for abandon. As if two daily outings and play and swimming in the pool 6 times per day and the meaningless other entertainment they offer me was enough... I am abused, I tell you all... abused!!!

the vertical garden

the staghorn

some hanging greeny things

I tried to help with the gardening but as per usual, got told to leave... ungrateful minions...

me helping to remove the offcuts...

What was she thinking!!!

So as I said the minions stayed at home and had a quite Christmas. Mum made us a roast duck with a bit of orange twist and some lovely roasted vegetables and steamed greens. Also had yummy custard and pudding. I thought we would share the duck roast but Mum only placed two plates on the table! How rude, where is poor Daddy going to eat? Uh what? Dad and Mum are eating on the table and not me? WHAT??? *sulk*

told him not to stay too long in the sun...

Apparently, I was supposed to go and eat my Christmas dinner on my mat. Didn't even have roasted vegetables with duck juices...

Christmas lunch

And then they opened the presents. Mum had a surprise for Dad... And oh my dog... She got him some bongo drums! What the?!?! And now all he does is looking at you tube and bang on his little piece of stretched rawhide... Doesn't even play and throw the ball for me. I think I'll have to nibble at the rawhide one of these days...

Daaaaad! My ball is at your feet!

Pfffft, enough with the bongos already...

Professor Mawson's experiment: life span of a pool ball

Dad had the good idea to get an inflatable pool ball for us to play. Mum was unconvinced of the half life of the pool ball...

So I put my lab coat and glasses on to conduct an experiment on the life span of the pool ball...

Material needed:

- A pool ball

- A minion to throw the pool ball

- A pool

- A Professor Mawson

- An external examiner (for the purpose of this experiment, I used another one of my minion)

Methodology and results:

Get the minion holding the ball to throw the ball in the pool.  Get in position to engage the chase. Splash, swim, swim...

Make contact and acquire the ball. If too inflated, round the ball in one of the pool corner and get a good grip... warning at this time a slight puncture sound might be heard and a very refreshing breeze might occur around the pup's canines...

Swim back with the pool ball to bring it back to the expectant throwing minion.

Reach back the entry point with a deflated limp pool ball, and bring back the defective pool ball to the minion... while a smug Mum looks over and says "I said so"...

Conclusion:
Within the experimental conditions tested, the life span of the pool ball was determined to be 15 seconds...

Christmas 2014

This year the minions and I had a fairly lazy Christmas. The main reason was because of my head bump, but also they had lots of work to do so the minions didn't take holidays... And then suddenly just on the 24th December something appeared in the living room! Sniff sniff, ohh that's the fake inside wee tree. Oh no sorry the inside plastic tree that I'm not allowed to use as a wee post... It's so confusing really!

After a short discussion, the minions decided to place plenty of weirdly coloured decorations on it. They usually go for a themed Christmas tree, but this year, I think the theme was "madness"!!

Ended up being quite pretty though. I kept offering my help to Mum and she repeatedly kept rejecting it... ungrateful... 

pretty Christmas tree

look there is even a dalmatian type dog,
a flamingo and a pelican!...

Now I'm pretty good with the decorations, I don't try and eat them, but I sure do like to sniff them. I like to stick my nose right on them and stare at Mum. Just gets her on the edge, just pretending that I "might" possibly want to crunch them, I don't really but I like to annoy Mum...

In the evening, I was minding my own business waiting next to the tree and Mum said that apparently one was supposed to leave milk and biscuits for "Santa" who was going to come during the night and the pups were supposed to go to bed... Sorry Santa but I drank the milk and ate the biscuit before going to sleep, just wanted to avoid you over-eating during your round really... And anyway, I was poorly so that doesn't count...

He apparently forgave me, because some present appeared overnight under the tree, yippee!!

Now, minions, can I open the presents, please, is it time to open the present?? Not yet?... And now? Is it time yet?? Please?? Is it time??...

Poor me :(

Well, buddies I have been extremely poorly! Ok I haven't really been that sick per se but one has to make it sound worse than it was. I need to milk it for all it is worth...
So you might have seen a little while ago in this blog, that I had a bit of a weird growth on my head that came and went without further explanation. Well it came back with a vengeance! Even had a big problem to shake my head when I was wet. Was not painful but very uncomfortable and bulky...

look at me bump!!

This time we went to see my nemesis: the VET guy! But I was very nicely behaved even though they  poked me about, molested me by placing "something" where one does not place "something" *sobs*. Then they decided that they needed to poke around some more later and I had to go back for a sedative the next day. They did a really dodgy shave job on my beautiful fur and sneaked a needle in my cheek... OUCH!!

After all the tests a few days later, they decided to give me a mahoosive antibiotic treatment for a nasty bug they had found in there. Been on it since and the bump is slowly reducing. I will need to go back next week to try to find out the cause of the whole mess. Some of my twitter pals got the idea it could be some giant space alien bees but got to be sure...
Don't want it to keep coming back. I have people to woe with my good looks me. Can't do it with a half tennis ball grafted on me face!

and that's how to milk it
was high on sedatives!!

I have been told that I am still handsome though... Phew...

The great storm

My woofness what weeks we are having. It is supposed to be summer, and in Oz that means a lot of sun and heat. But for a while we have had heaps of rain and crazy storms. Now, it is not too bad to have rain as Dad is happy that the grass is watered so it grows and he can keep cutting it... But I have had a bit enough now!

We have had everything but mostly lots of rain! The minions have had to empty the pool numerous times. We have even had a huge hail storm! You can see the amount of water and hail in the short video.

The hail stones were bigger than my paws!! Was the first time that I saw things like that falling from the sky. I had heard about cold stuff called snow from some of my buddies on twitter but never something like that! I tried to play with it and crunch some, but it was a bit cold on my tootsies...

nearly as big as a tea light!!

Then, on that same day it rained even more. We had more than 10 cm in the space of just 10 minutes and lots of wind. After all of the hail and the amount of water falling down, it started raining in the house too... The minions were running around like headless chickens with buckets and towels to try to contain the leaks.
I promise, it wasn't even me...

Following our amusement, mum decided that I hadn't had enough exercise in the morning, so she declared that we were going for a walk around the block.
She got all ready quickly .... So after my snooze, uh sorry I did say quickly... Well we started walking, I was sniffing a bit, a few metres in some drops started coming down. about 100m in, we were getting properly soaked. We only turned the corner of the street and Mum said we had to run back home. Which means I had to drag her bum all the way down the street. She is so slow I helped quickening things up. Dunno why she was scared to trip and be dragged through the mud...
So basically we had the shortest wettest walk ever. Then the storm started again. Winds were so strong that they pushed the stone mushroom from the front garden... Vandal!! Where am I going to wee in the morning?!?!

I think that I should definitely start building an arch, we could all move in, the girls and I can snuggle together... 

The great hunter is back!

Oh my dogness! I am going to fire my personal assisting minion. She has been so slack with my blog, I keep barking her to let me on the computer but would she listen??? Noooo....

Anyway, I got a few things to tell you but I'll start with the most important one: I love spring/summer evenings. They are great because there are lots of bunnies around with their lovely little white fluffy tails and I can show off my great hunting skills! Mum says that she is ashamed to go walking with me because I get a tad too excited even though we have been doing lots of training to calm me down. Last time she was amazed that I actually really passed a coupe of buns while walking relatively nicely on the lead after she told me to "leave it". However, I made up for it on the next one. She told me that the people in the street were going to think that she was pulling my legs off with a tweezer, all 10 of them... pfffft she always exaggerate *ahem* I was just vocalising my enthusiasm and showing off the new trick Mum & I have been working on: walking on my back legs like she does...

There is one thing that I don't like because it makes Mum sad though. Quite often on our walk in the weeks going up to Christmas, we see some bunnies of a strange colour. Not like the usual pals I try to "play" with. Mum says that they are not wild but some domestic bunnies that people let go because of the holidays. She says that her and Dad were helping the fluffs like that when they were living in the UK. I did offer to take them home but Mum looked at me with a sideway glance that made me think she didn't trust my rescuing skills... Domestic bunnies or not, they are still not coming to play with me, they might be asocial or something...

Last Wednesday, something different happened. We went for a walk on one of our usual route and suddenly a young male bush turkey ran out at us. Had lovely colours. He kept following us and was so close!! I usually don't really care about the bush turkeys because they are not exactly brainy, but this one was a little ballsy pal. I half heartedly told him to leave us alone with just a few little jumps in his direction, he was staying around less than half a metre away from me!! And he still stayed around turning his feathery bum to us and scratching dirt at us!!! Mum even got twigs on her head... I gave up pretty quickly in my hope of telling him to choof off. He followed us for more than 200m, backwards, scratching at us like an idiot!! Was fun but then he gave up and ran back with his little puffed up chest feeling all proud of himself to have chased us away... whatever mate...

Alright now I have to put my little paws on my ears because mum is having trouble put her lenses on, and she is using a language that no pup should be subjected to... I'll tell you of some more of our adventures from the past few weeks soon, promise!

Puppymodo

Well pals, I was complaining about Mum being a bit clumsy and bumping on stuff, but I have to say that I did beat her on the dodgy happenings... Just before Dad came back last week, Mum thought that I was looking a bit weird. She looked at me a bit closer and turns out that I had a rather big bump on me head! Just on one side! I had a bit of an eye ouchy during the week before but she took care of it and it cleared up. My head really blew up, quite a bit and fairly quickly. The minions waited to see how it was going, before deciding if we were visiting to the dreaded V.E.T.  as I was still eating (well why wouldn't you?!?!?!) and behaving as normal, that is to say very well, of course!! Thankfully they held up for the vet as they believed it was going to stress me more at the time. And apparently another GSP lady had the same thing happen to her and it passed all alone.
Mum is pretty sure that on the second day I had a few hours with a bit of a temperature but then the bump came down and it was feeling much less hot.

You will be happy to know that I am back to my handsome self now, all is sorted, and I did that all alone too in just a couple of days. They think I must have had a small infection, maybe in the ear, that cleared up. They do not think I knocked myself on something or got bitten.

Mum's other explanation is that my brain leaked out, though she says it's surprising with only one neurone...!! RUDE!!!

I think I will make up my own dramatic story, just because Mum's ones are either far too pragmatic...or too rude...

Lovely handsome ME!

puppymodo...

Daddy has abandoned me...again!

Pals, things have been bad bad bad in the house this week... I had a lovely Saturday with Dad last week end and then BAM!! He disappeared on Sunday, left me all alone with Mum. And gosh, I tell you she surpassed herself in clumsiness this week.

I'm not even talking about running in spider webs or tripping on things when we are out walking... This morning she actually slipped down a slight inclination we were following! But this is nothing!! She went to chat with the neighbour after coming back from work one day and swore she would just be 30 minutes max... Well 2 hours later she rocked up saying sorry and all!! I was crossing my paws to go to the bathroom me! 

Then she succeeded to lock us out of the house yesterday. She says it's my fault because I was rushing her whining while she was getting the treats ready... As if an innocent little pup like me could be blamed for airhead mum to not take the keys with her before closing the doors... Luckily we did go to have fun before she came back and broke in the house! Ok she didn't really break in the house she just found that she hadn't closed the bathroom window before going out in the morning... Phew, all my shinbone money nearly went on calling a locksmith out of hours!

Oh yeah and another example, we were playing a nice game of fetch in the backyard and BAM (again..) Mum very skilfully sent my toy on the roof... She had to go get the big ladder which is very heavy. I was fearing the worst, but luckily we survived this without me having to drive her to the emergency hospital...

Well Dad would better come back quickly from his little boat trip, work or no work, because I am not so sure there will be much more left of the female minion soon. Did I tell you that she banged her head with the mower? No? You know our new mower has got a little handle on spring that need to be kept up while moving for safety cutout of the engine, well she was moving the machine (not while it was ON I must admit) and she pressed the handle bend down while manoeuvring and moved her hand off... the spring works, Mum's forehead less so *sigh* it's a bit blue now... 

Ok I'd better stop there or she's going to be upset I'm telling you all this, if she reads that post... Going to look out for Dad, he should surely come home someday soon...

poor innocent little angelic me

The hen parties

It's been a long time I haven't told you about how the ladies are going. They've grown lots and are now super huge and looking juicy... *ahem* I mean looking very lush like lovely lady hens *cough cough* .... I go to open and close their coop everyday, ok not me exactly but the minions let me come with them and point at the coop while they do it. Last time I saw them in front of me, the door was open and there was nothing between me and them... but mum had told me to stay down a meter away... Oh I wish I could have gone and given them a cuddle... *sobs*

At least they've really got going on the egg front and they have been giving plenty. The minions don't feed me nearly enough of them and they give them all away too!! They say they can't keep up with the quantities, I could me, but as always they just don't listen to me... The eggs are funny, they are all different shape and colours!

The poor hens have been hassled by the magpies as I have too, these magpies are so nasty and they really go for them. I do my best to alert the minions but because I'm not allowed in the front garden due to an old and false accusation of jumping the front fence and running across the busy road, I can't go and sort them out myself... But they are surviving, they also get some guests in their run. The ladies keep digging at the edge under the coop and a group of pigeons keep sneaking in. They are nice looking pigeons very well together young lads... But mum's not happy that the girls are having parties and sharing their food. The minions say they want to meet the parents first *rolls eyes* seriously... They're crazy... ;P

Mildred running to the opportunity of sunflower seeds

Winifred talking back... as per usual...

fancy miss Barnie keeping an eye on mum
and Buffie at the back

What hot summer's days are for...

Even though it's not summer yet, things are warming up quickly. We've had quite a few days above 30˚C and today was one hot one again. To top it all there is a real strong wind and some rain. You'd think it would cool things down but NO it only makes it super hot and HUMID!!!

It is really too much for a poor pup. So the best way to beat that heat, apart to stay flat under the fan inside... Is to get splashings from the minions! Now I am very specific and particular with my splashes, mostly with the hose... I don't like the hose... so they need to be just right! Luckily I have taught the minions the right way :)

An other option to stay cool is to whine to get in the swimming pool! I loooove the swimming pool, I think I could stay in there all day, but kill-joy mum never let's me, pffft... However, I have tricked her into throwing water non stop lately. It's easy you see, I just need to do a few crazy jumps and she will keep throwing water trying to make me do some more! She is so easy to fool...

look! I'm flying!!!

uh no, that damn gravity...

there appears to be a new species of shark in the pool!

I need to be careful and stay cool as well because I saw dad bringing back some sandwich bread and he said he was hungry... don't want to end up as a hot dog!!!... Alright I'd stay chatting here, but I'm feeling a tad heated... time to go stand in front of the pool door and whine methinks, see ya laters  pals :)

Who needs a groomer...

So this weekend, the minions did some work in the garage. Bit of clean up under the house.. went to check too, and at the same time I perfected my Haloween costume... turns out there are quite a few spiders living under the house! I don't know why mum was all worked up really... 1) I cleaned up for her and 2) I didn't even come out of there doing woohoohoo to scare her, so really she is just whining for nothing.

Dad is also rejuvenating the storage space in the garage. Bit of sanding, change of worktop and door handles, and he has also picked a lovely new colour to repaint the whole cupboard set. A nice little blue. I like it very much actually... So much so that I think it would perfectly enhance my beautiful eyes and contrast magnificently with my fur colour. So I decided to add a few highlights of blue on the fur of my ear. Just on the edges, you don't want to overdo it, after it looks too try-hard!!

Mum had something to say about that too... this minion is never happy about anything really...

shame you can't see well,
but I do think that that beautiful blue is great with my fur