Dog's guide for new things

I have noticed, times and times again, that the minions seem to have trouble understanding how things work with me around here...
So here is a very simple guide for them (or any other pup's minions) to follow:

- If the minions have food for the pup, the pup will want to eat it now.
- If the minions have food for themselves, the pup will want to eat it now.

Actually, let's rephrase: if there is food anywhere in the vicinity of a pup, the pup will want to eat it...

Now that that's cleared up, let us look into another issue: new things. Let's be clear any item coming through that front door needs to be checked and verified by the Pup Border Control. Think about the Australian customs, but in more thorough... And as any self respecting pup would know, the best way to check anything is to put it in your mouth!

Also another thing, the minions presence and undivided attention is required, at any time, in any manner or circumstance, whatever they "want" or "have" to do. Nothing is more important. Even if the minion can be seen or is behind a closed door (transparent or not) I will whine until full access is restored. And it does not matter if another minion is right next to the pup at the time, by the way...

Alright, that should have cleared up a few things, from now on, don't let me have to tell you again!

you're sure you don't have any food there?