Thursday 26 June 2014

Routine

Then the best part of the morning was that Mum made a bit of breakfast and some toasts yehahh, now that's what I'm taking about! Some nice crunchy toast in my belly, errr, sorry nice toasts for "her" brekkie...
She started walking around with her toast and she said she was going for her shower... Well, ok, why not... And shall I add: yeepee toast and splashes!!

She nonchalantly went in the bathroom, so I followed her in. But then, she closed the door behind me! Eh what!?!? and then she.... well she... I can't even tell it, it's so raw!! So emotional...
She WASHED me all over with the smelly flowery shampoo!!! YUK!

And it was morning! She usually washes me in the afternoon!!! And she took a toast! The toast didn't even have anything on it. It was PLAIN toast

Next time I'l make sure that I follow only toasts with something worth it on, like foie gras or peanut butter. I guess I would have known something was up with the peanut butter cause she doesn't like it. However, who cares: a whole toast with peanut butter on it would be ok in exchange for just a tail rinse. Not the full body wash though, that would take more, much much more!!

At least I might have found a way to make all that malarkey less traumatic. Some of my twitter pals are developing fox poo and rabbit poo conditioners in their secret underground laboratory!! I NEED some!!!

Sunday 22 June 2014

Dog's guide for new things

I have noticed, times and times again, that the minions seem to have trouble understanding how things work with me around here...
So here is a very simple guide for them (or any other pup's minions) to follow:

- If the minions have food for the pup, the pup will want to eat it now.
- If the minions have food for themselves, the pup will want to eat it now.

Actually, let's rephrase: if there is food anywhere in the vicinity of a pup, the pup will want to eat it...

Now that that's cleared up, let us look into another issue: new things. Let's be clear any item coming through that front door needs to be checked and verified by the Pup Border Control. Think about the Australian customs, but in more thorough... And as any self respecting pup would know, the best way to check anything is to put it in your mouth!

Also another thing, the minions presence and undivided attention is required, at any time, in any manner or circumstance, whatever they "want" or "have" to do. Nothing is more important. Even if the minion can be seen or is behind a closed door (transparent or not) I will whine until full access is restored. And it does not matter if another minion is right next to the pup at the time, by the way...

Alright, that should have cleared up a few things, from now on, don't let me have to tell you again!
you're sure you don't have any food there?

Thursday 19 June 2014

Finally!

Hi there! Gosh that's a real fight to be able to access the computer these days! Mum's always saying she's working... Who is she trying to kid, I can see she's just looking at the newspaper! 
Anyway, we've been doing plenty of things, lots of walks and retrieving work lately. A bit of agility in the backyard too, but lots of Obedience/RallyO moves with precision work for 'gility too. And Mum and I have been busting some dance moves. We need a bit of practice if we want to get dance routines together, so it's trick times here. And the advantage is that sometimes we don't need to go out too much late in the day cause it's dark and cold outside!!!

My main problem lately though, is that there are a lot of possums and kangaroos around and Mum never lets me play with them... Not fair! We even saw thousands of babbits a few nights ago and still she kept going on and on about how I had to sit and be calm... blah blah blah... I'm sure that they would have loved a game of chase really... Who wouldn't? But Mum doesn't seem to want to bulge from that idea, so I guess I'll have to humour her for a bit... However, to show my discontent when we're back home, I'll pout until she notices, take pity and give me her food... Not that it works much, I'm just starving...
I'll pout and sulk then...

Saturday 14 June 2014

House chores

As you may know, Dad is a bit obsessed with mowing. Personally I don't really get it but I thought I was going to have a bit of bonding time with him... So I got him to teach me how to mow the loan. Gosh what did I start! He was just going on and on and on. Explaining all the details about not only the mower, but how and when to cut the grass...
Let's get started!
After a bit he finally told me how to start the big machine. So I have to hold the handle down and pull on that little handle. Then it should start, but I have to keep holding the handle down, pfff not easy!
that's where the starting squiggly is...
And then, gosh, he restarted talking about everything for ages. I just wanted to get on with it and have my dinner... But at least now I know how to mow (ow ow ow :P ), so I can do that during the day when the minions are out, working hard for my kibble.
pfff, blah blah blah... can he get on with it...

Thursday 12 June 2014

The correct sofa etiquette

I've been a very good boy and behaved so I've been allowed to write another post... :P
You might have heard that I am not allowed on the house furnitures, either sofas *sigh* or the big minions' bed *BIG sigh* (they're just space hugger, that place is so big they get lost in there, so I don't see why I'm not allowed up there...).

I've tried everything over the time from the sneaky slow motion crawl up to the brazen jump up and curl in an unmovable pile of gooey mess. All attempts resulted in a one demand to go off followed by a heartless tilt of the sofa if I did not comply... How rude!!!

So I tried a few things... Wasn't easy to work out the proper way or limit in-between the too much, i.e. get thrown off, and the too little, i.e. a bit of a let down aka the floor...
I tried the full on jump on Dad as if I didn't see he was there and see what happens. Well I can tell you straight away, not a good outcome for team pup...
Then I tried the "oh hello! Is that seat next to you taken?" approach... Not much better outcome!
Then I thought that maybe if I was distracting him with a bit of a play he might forget that I was actually on the sofa and keep playing. That could theoretically work, they have a short-term memory those minions so you need to try and manage that to your advantage... Result: it worked for about 30 seconds... Not a convincing amelioration of the state of affairs...
So I had to have a bit of a rethink of my plan. The problem is that they do not want me to be fully on the sofa. I can put a couple of paws up when we do trainings but that's not really satisfying... really...
I want to be able to sit on there me! And then bingo!! I found the perfect solution!
Now that's the way to do it... Comfily sitting on the sofa but all the paws touch the floor so they can't tell me off, mwahaha the advantage of having long legs!!! Then add a soupçon of the "eye" and you got the complete correct sofa etiquette! Infallible...

I think I'm in trouble...

Hello everybody, sorry for the non posting for a while, but I've been grounded... I've been very naughty...

Last Sunday we went for an agility trial in Newcastle. Was really far, long trip in the car and early start of the day. Mum would have preferred to stay in bed but we all crawled in the car anyway. Think we should have stayed home, wouldn't be in trouble now...

We arrived there and saw some of our mates. Was nice to see Jaxon and his mum Frankie again. That's a long time we haven't seen each other. They had a fab week end and they even got their JD title! Woohoo.

We had entered in 4 events, jumping excellent and open and agility novice and open. It was a new ground we had never been before, and we did as we always do, Mum goes around visiting with me for a bit of a walk and burn a bit of energy, while Dad goes to see the courses and stuffs.

Our first run was JDX. Had a pretty cool time! I was real fast and we both had a great time, I just dropped a bar and overshot one of the jumps but all in all a fast and furious honourable attempt. Even the lovely judge told so.

Then came the time for the novice agility. Dad wasn't too enthused about it and a bit grumpy about something. our turn came and I was a bit distracted, overshot the weaves and Dad made me come back and the judge started talking to Dad in the middle of the run, and I got pissed off... I... ahem... how to say... well told the judge what I thought about it, and I might... ahem... have nipped at his jacket too... *embarrassed* I didn't like that judge and he made my buddy's mum cry... Never had any problem with any other in the past and never been a problem, cause they're not supposed to talk...
Dad wasn't looking very happy, and he didn't finish the course. And then Mum wasn't happy either. And then I didn't even get to run the rest of the agility :(

But worse, I think that I am in big trouble cause I can't go to trials anymore for a couple of months and then I must show that I have changed my ways.
I can tell you that the minions have already been rethinking *again* what we do. I'm on the straight and narrow, so I got to behave.

Mum says that she was anyway thinking of adding a few more serious posts about my "issues" on here and the training we do to alleviate them. She says it could be useful for other minions facing that kind of problems but I think she just wants to dob on me... Well for now I'll go back in my corner to eat my hard bread and water *sobs*...

Wednesday 4 June 2014

The girls are growing a lot!

It's a long time I haven't talked to you about the girls isn't it! Well the feathery butts are still here, all of them... not my fault!... And gosh unless mum swaps them every week, I think they are growing quite a lot. 
One thing for sure is that they are not scared of me. Depending of the day and the state I am in, I either pretty much just glance at them or go on the full point trance (well for example if mum made me run in rabbit heaven just before...). Mum is always laughing at me cause the point usually happens in the late evening when they are not even out, but who cares they SMELL!!!

Last weekend I was very upset, because the minions both went out and played chase and catch with the girls! I wanted to play too but I was stuck in the house, how unfair! But then they said that they were treating the girls, eww the girls are dirty, nananananereuh, ewww better keep my distance ;P
Apparently they were discussing that the girls might soon get more space and start being allowed to run free in the front garden! Uh what? MORE space out of MY house? I don't think so!! Has anybody even asked for my opinion? I'm not even mentioning asking for my permission...

And I don't want to say, but I thought all that malarkey was supposed to be for all the eggs they were going to produce to make my treats, not wanting to dob on anyone but I don't see a lot of eggs! I'm not buying the "it's winter" excuse. Those girls are lazy and living the good life without having to pay their way! Or they are broken... Oh yeah I like that explanation better... Muuuuuummmm the hens are broken and not working, I'll go and eat them to make space for new ones... thx brb :*
the young'uns
better look at the little silver grey dorking on the right
the "old" folks
all of the girls in complete... ahem...
harmony??
PS for my lovely readers who haven't suffered enough the annoyance of english text writing thx brb :* means thanks, I'll be right back, kisses!

Tuesday 3 June 2014

A question of free will

Anybody who has a pup will know something about this, heck, I have even heard that a lot of human pups have got the same "issue". What issue am I barking about you will ask me? Well I am talking about water, baths/showers to be more precise...

I am a gun dog, ok you knew that or maybe not but now you've been warned :P! I am born to go into water, any type of water: rivers, dams, sea and  even swimming pools! I loooove water. The minions even have issues getting me out of the swimming pool on a fine summer day.
My most addictive occupation is splashies. I love it when the minions throw water and I try to catch it with my mouth, I can do that all day, literally... I tried to get mum to keep going but she gives up too quickly... And the splashies can be anywhere in the pool or wherever water is present. I even try and sneak in the bathroom when mum or dad are having a shower in the hope of getting some stray splashings! My desperate attempts have made me go a tad too close to mum while she was washing her hair and she called me a pervert last time and shooed me away ever since. Doesn't mean I don't  still try and creep my way close...

But anyway I digress! So now you might have gathered I like water in all shape or form. And this brings me to the minions' lamentation: why oh why I will in no way step into the shower for my regular wash? Early on they tried to get me in the bath, well that lasted... approximately 30 seconds... that's the time it took me to craze my way out (I was young and uncoordinated at that age you see, so I was rather slow...). Ever since that day they chose the "safe" option of the shower. But as soon as mum closes the door and put the shower head down, I will find the furthest point in the bathroom and stand away. Don't like the wet stuff anymore, it's toxic! And the shampoo, urgh makes me smell like a girl!! Now don't shout it, but I actually like the massage and that all fresh feeling after the wash. I get a bit excited crazy too!

So what is different you will ask me, well this is it! It is all about free will!! I want to go in the swimming pool or the murky dam, and I crave splashes, but in the shower I am forced to go and get pat patted everywhere and it's just not how I choose!!! No I'm not pig headed... much...
But that all shows you humans that there is always a different presentation of things to us pups. And well a few more treats might help the "abuse" suffered in the shower and the loss of all my lovingly accumulated dirt and stinkiness! I'm just saying...
ahhh a nice little bubbly spa,
actually no bubbles, too scary...
splashies, I love those!!!!